Dear Mr. FedEx...

I wish I could explain to you the significance of the three pound envelope you hold in your hands. To you it is just another package to throw in a big plastic bin but to me it is so much more. To me it contains the most precious legal documents I have ever entrusted to another complete stranger human being. All within one neatly labeled and organized package, this envelope contains the culmination of my effort over the past six months. I have spent countless hours compiling the contents to perfection. If I didn't have issues with flying I would have flown to DC to hand deliver it myself. Considering I have to step on an airplane next week I'm going to trust you to handle this for me.

Thank you so much for humoring me for a photograph. Just as I explained, your photo will become part of our daughter's baby book. I genuinely appreciate the "real smile" you put forth (after I jokingly asked you to set aside the cool college guy smile and "give me a REAL smile"). However, I must admit that my reasoning was two fold. Yes, you will make the baby book but you have also made the Womble Most Wanted List. I now know where you work, your employee number AND I have your mug shot. Just in case I need to find you again. Do you understand what I'm sayin'? Just in case we aren't clear let me spell it out for you...

Do NOT lose, damage or destroy this package. I give you permission to lose someone's birthday package or my next Amazon.com order but not THIS package. It is too important. PLEASE DO NOT, I repeat, PLEASE DO NOT LOSE THIS PACKAGE. Are ya with me?

Regards,
one very stressed adoptive Mommy