Celebrating Forever Family Day!

Tonight we celebrated our first Forever Family Day the way most Chinamerican families do. Chinese food, of course. I know a few people who thought this idea was absolutely brilliant...
And to top the cake we indulged in a few treats from J's Bakery. No celebration would be complete without yummy treats, right? Yummmmmm...
Happy Forever Family Day to all of us but especially to our little noodle head! What a difference a year can make!

Happy Forever Family Day Mei Mei!

Dear Mei Mei,

Exactly one year ago, at 3 pm China time, we officially became a forever family of 5. It seems like yesterday we were sitting in the Civil Affairs Building waiting for your name to be called. I remember it as if it were yesterday. There you were behind the curtain sitting quietly on a little stool. We were overjoyed to see you, a living breathing little person, instead of the still photographs we had memorized during our wait. Our hearts were about to explode in anticipation. A bittersweet day for all of us...

I have replayed those moments many times over the past year. It was like being in the delivery room with 46 families as we all became parents simultaneously. Loud. Chaotic. Sweltering HEAT. Crying babies. Emotional Mommy's and Daddy's. Lots of Cantonese. A guide trying to keep it all together. In a nutshell, sheer pandemonium.

I remember the look on your face when you were handed to your Daddy. I remember your cry and the fear in your eyes. I remember how tiny you felt in my arms. I remember how Mrs. Jenny whispered in my ear, "She will be ok...just give her time." I remember the prayers I prayed over you... "Lord, please comfort her in a way I can't. Lord, please tell her YOU will love her forever...and so will we. Lord, please help us know how to help her." I remember feeling so ill equipped to be your Mommy but knowing with certainty that you were the daughter of our hearts.

We've had quite a year. Many firsts. Many prayers. Many moments. Many struggles. Many snuggles. Many confirmations. Many aha moments. You have come SO far but then again so have the rest of us. Slowly but surely we have woven together as a family of 5. We have been blessed to watch you blossom into a smart, funny, joyful, dramatic, loving and full of life little girl. You've made us love deeper and taught us more than we ever could have taught you over the past year. The day we became your family is one of the most joyful and miraculous days of our lives. Someday you may choose not to celebrate this day and if that is your wish we will certainly honor it. Whatever your decision may be, we will always quietly give thanks for September 14th and the privilege of being chosen to be your family... forever.

Happy Forever Family Day Mei Mei!
We love you all the way to China and back again...

Meeting Dr. C...

Today was Mei Mei's first visit with our pediatric dentist, Dr. C. Rightfully so in my opinion, Mei Mei is not fond of strangers looking inside her mouth in any shape, form or fashion. That alone made it a "prepare for the worst--hope for the best" kind of morning. When it was all said and done, she showed Dr. C her "chompers" with pride and bravery. She had a full set of xray's and an exam with only a few tears. We were SO proud of her! The verdict is still out as to the extent of dental and orthodontic work she will need in the future. We really will not know more until her mouth has time to grow and her permanent teeth begin to emerge. For now Dr. C said everything looks great and we are so thankful! To end our eventful morning, Little Miss taught her everything she needed to know about Dr. C's prize cart. What did she choose from 200 little trinket toy possibilities? A purple monkey and a faux 50 carat sparkly ring. Her sister has taught her well.

September 12: an extraordinary day

On 9-12-09 the Chief and I planted our feet upon the GREAT Wall of China...
I still get butterflies when I think of that day...
What an AMAZING site to behold...
Positively breathtaking...
A dream became a reality...
it was FINALLY our turn...
Really, truly, magnificently, extraordinarily one of the most memorable days of my life...


One year later on 9-12-10 we stood beside this little guy...
our firstborn...our Wild Man...the one who made us Mommy and Daddy...
Once again...butterflies...but for an entirely different reason...
Once again...an AMAZING site to behold...Once again...POSITIVELY BREATHTAKING...
Once again...a dream became reality...
Really, truly, magnificently, extraordinarily one of the most memorable days of my life...
(and for the record, the Great Wall of China is nothing in comparison to 9-12-2010!)

I have prayed for this day since I knew of his existence. The day our son would freely choose to love and serve the God who created him. That day came on July 27, 2010. Today was his day to tell the world. For most of his life, Jeremiah 29:11 has been etched upon my Mommy heart specifically for this child. It says, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Today that verse became alive and active before our eyes. Thank you Lord for the blessing of September 12th...our extraordinary day.

Dear Wild Man,

We are rejoicing with you tonight on one of the most significant days of your life. Without a doubt, no life decision will be ever be more important than the one you shared with the world today. We are so proud of the young man you are becoming. We can not wait to see the plans God has in store for your life.

All our love,
Mommy and Daddy

Flashback: 9-9-09

One year ago at this moment the Chief and I were seated here...upon this very large metal tube...
flying about 33,000 feet somewhere above the North Pole...
While we watched Everybody Loves Raymond for the 25th time and envied every sleeping passenger around us, BusinessFirst treated us like royalty...I'm pretty sure if you take photos of your food in BusinessFirst...
and how much leg room you REALLY have...they automatically know you don't belong there. We survived our 14.5 hour flight without sleep, medication, quarantine or a need for the mini bar...
Mission Accomplished!

Our Ballerina Girl...

I have...

ahem...

Little Miss has been dreaming of this special day for most of her life. The day she would officially step into a pair of ballet slippers and become a "real ballerina".
I had...

ahem...

Little Miss had a great plan for her first day of "ballerina lessons".

New tights. CHECK. {I bought the wrong ones but she didn't know}

New pink leotard. CHECK!

First pair of ballet slippers. CHECK!!

Hair in the cutest little bun you've ever seen. CHECK!!!

Pink toes. CHECK x 10!!!!
Our little ballerina girl RAN down the sidewalk to "dancing class" as fast as she could. She paused only for a moment to oblige her Mommy (who was innocently bribering offering her a piece of candy if she would let Mommy take just ONE picture)...
Mission Accomplished.

Our Little Miss...

now officially our "ballerina girl". How did she grow up so fast? She is not happy that Mei Mei isn't going to be a "real ballerina" this year BUT she has big plans for next year. Coming in Fall 2011...according to Little Miss...the Womble "Ballerina Twins". I LOVE LOVE LOVE that my girl thinks that is possible. ;-)
PS: If anyone knows how to convince a four year old that it's OK to wear tights and a leotard without pan-ties, please let me know. Someday I'll be glad she finds that appalling, right?

First Day of Preschool...

Today was the first day of preschool for our sweet Little Miss. She's been counting the days since Wild Man went back a few weeks ago. It was "sooooo unfair" that HE got to go back to school and SHE did not.

Our little early bird was dressed and ready for school by 6 AM. One little problem. Preschool doesn't start until 9. She was bouncing off the walls all morning with backpack and lunch bag in hand. When you're four years old, three hours is a long time to wait for the first day of preschool to begin.

She was over the moon until we pulled into the parking lot. Then shy and timid Little Miss made her appearance. She agreed to let me take her picture with her new teachers but couldn't muster a happy smile. We'll settle for the nervous smile instead. Bless her heart.
By 2:00 pick up she was smiling from ear to ear. She had a fabulous day! She loves her new teachers and has a few little friends from last year in her class. What more could a girl ask? We're looking forward to a fantabulous (final--sniff sniff) year of preschool.

Meant to Be...

After my blahblahblah from yesterday, I thought I would sum it up with this...

Why?

A few days ago I was cornered into THE conversation. The one I try hard to avoid.

The one that usually begins in the presence of my children with "why".
Why adoption? Why international adoption? Why China? Why adopt when you can have children of your own?

From there it slowly moves toward the "what and how".
What is wrong with her? How do you fix that? What a lucky little girl she is...

Can I tell you how awkward this conversation is for me? With people who are genuinely interested in adoption, I am more than happy to share. Please hear me when I say this. If you want to talk adoption, I can talk adoption all week long. I can talk adoption until you no longer want to talk adoption. Seriously. Ask my husband. But with strangers? Stranger people who are simply being nosey or malicious, I want to plug my babies ears and tell them to stick it. In so many words. With a few not so nice words mixed in.

"What is wrong with your kid?"
"Does she speak HUMAN?"
"Why did you adopt one of THOSE kids?"
"Can you fix THAT so she will look normal?"

Each and every time these questions surface I am dumbfounded. Most of the time I spit out one of many scripted answers and we move on as quickly as possible. Other times I don't even know how to answer. I want to scoop up my children and run. I want to hide them from the world that awaits them. I want to hide her from the words of those people. Those people who only see her on the outside. The people who can't get past the almond eyes and the dark hair. The people who act as if her precious face is open for discussion. Guess what stranger people? It isn't!

So what's a Momma to do? I know. I know. I know I need to answer with kindness and grace but what I really want to do is punch them in the nose. Fiercely. With everything in me.

I want to shout and kick and scream and yell about their insensitive and hurtful comments.

I want to ask them if they would ask such questions about someone else's husband or friend in the middle of Target? Why is it any different when the questions are about a child?

I want to tell them that God's heart is to see children in families--children from China, Seattle, Guatemala, Africa, Houston, Russia, Atlanta or anywhere in between.

I want to tell them she is as much "my own" as the two that came before her.

I want to shout it at the top of my lungs...THERE. IS. NOTHING. WRONG. WITH. OUR. DAUGHTER! She is PERFECT just the way God made her on the day she was born! I want them to see her for the beautiful Mei Mei she is. Not by her hair or her eyes or her special need.

I want to make them understand that Mei Mei is not "lucky". WE are the ones who have been blessed by HER...not the other way around.

I want them to know we do NOT NEED THEIR APPLAUSE OR APPROVAL! Some seem to believe if they end their rude intrusive conversation with something like "Well, you are such a good person for taking care of her". WHAT? WE ARE NOT TAKING CARE OF HER! WE ARE NOT BABYSITTING! SHE IS OUR DAUGHTER PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!

So the next time someone asks me "Why?" I'm going to ask them the same... "Why do you want to know?" I'm ready to see someone else squirm their way out of that awkward conversation (instead of me). Someday Mei Mei will take her cues from us. If we tuck our tails and walk away we are teaching her she has something to be ashamed. Something we shouldn't talk about. That's not the case. Is Mei Mei adopted? No. Mei Mei WAS adopted. Big difference. Until the world begins to see it my way, the inner Mama Bear will be ready and waiting to pounce.

One Year Ago Today...

These little letters graced the blog. It was the end of the paperwork and the beginning of the "Destination: CHINA" whirlwind. A lot has changed since that exciting day. A lot. Over the next month I'll be flashing back to many important dates and milestones in 2009. Can't wait...

Going Back to China...

Well, not actually the Womble 5 but it's as close to China as we're going to be for a while. After that title I'm pretty sure a few of you need to put your jaw back into the upright position. :-) Now, look closely...
What do you see?
Something familiar?
Besides the huge plane.
Think Jansport.
Lower left corner.
Do you see it?

It's the green backpack. The ole girl has seen us through college, overnight trips and vacations. {Yes, our backpack is a girl in case you were wondering}. She's even traveled around the world and for the next two weeks she'll be in the process of doing it once again. Lucky girl! Oh how I wish I could have crawled in and tagged along but I'll have to settle for a photo.

A photo of our beloved green backpack.
Strapped around the arms of our dear and precious friend.
Boarding an Air China flight for the 2nd time in her "life".
On her way to meet a new baby.
To witness another miracle unfold.
To watch another family grow.
To see and smell and taste and experience the place.
The place that has settled quietly between the beat of my heart.

China...
{sigh}
until my feet are planted firmly upon you once again...
I'll live vicariously through our green backpack...
because she's as close to that piece of my heart as I can be...

for now...

Back "2" School...

Wild Man went back "TWO" school today as an official SECOND grader. Wait! A second grader? Are we old enough to have a 2nd grader? Apparently we are. {Sigh} I vow not to be nostalgic. I will not blahblahblah about how he SHOULD NOT be in 2nd grade. I will not admit to being a little teary while walking behind him down the second grade hall. Nope. I will not. I will also not admit I was relieved to hear the bickering and sighs of boredom fade into the distance with each passing minute. Goodbye dog days of summer. Hello routine and structure for all. He has been SO READY to go back to school and see his friends. He really missed them. This year he is in a class of 17 but with only one classmate from Kindergarten. He was a little unsure about that lineup. Before school we talked a lot about how to have a friend you have to be a friend. He was a little nervous but by the end of the day he was telling me all about his new 2nd grade pals. He's going to be just fine. Like it or not, he's growing up (whether I put a brick on his head or not). I can't wait to see what 2nd grade has in store for our Wild Man.

First Day of Kindergarten
Wild Man and Mrs. Polka Dots
August 2008

First Day of 1st Grade
Wild Man and Mrs. Patience
August 2009
First Day of 2nd Grade
(Registration Day)
Wild Man and Mommy
August 2010
Unfortunately, Wild Man's new teacher is recovering from surgery and wasn't at school this week. We are hoping and praying she will return soon so he can get in a good routine from the beginning. In the meantime, we'll take it one second grade day at a time.

the Serenity Now Post Birthday Extravaganza...

A few weeks ago I celebrated the 3rd anniversary of my 29th birthday. Or was it the 2nd anniversary of my 30th birthday? I dunno? Anyway. As a gift to me, the Chief planned a little belated something special for me us. I've affectionately dubbed it the "Serenity Now Post Birthday Extravaganza". {Extravaganza...what is it about the word Extravaganzaaaaahhhh? It makes me laugh every time I say the word...ex-trava-gan-zahhhhhhhhh. See what I mean?}

Our serenity lasted 24 hours and it was the amazing. Spa. Massage. Pedicure. Swanky Dinner. Free Birthday Desert complete with my own candle (care to guess what I wished for--hehehehehehehe). One full night of uninterrupted sleep. Breakfast of champions (AKA Starbucks). Then back to reality. If that list doesn't qualify as serenity I don't know what will.

For those of you wondering. Yep, the Chief had a pedicure. And he liked it. And I can say that. Because he rarely reads this blog. So he'll never know I told the world anyway. Bwahahahah... (and he'll gladly tell any guy on the block that a spa day with the wifey is awesome and they don't know what they're missing).
A special thank you to Miss Amanda, Nanny and JimPa for helping the Chief. We rarely have any length of time to ourselves and after the year we've had we really really needed it. Thank you so much!

To my fellow shipmates...

Thanks to all who replied to my "I'm about to jump ship blahblahblah" post from the other day. I'm glad to know I'm not floating in this boat alone. I did not publish every comment because many were very personal but I read every single one. Being a wife, Mother, friend and _____ is hard work for most of us at this stage in our lives. However, a very wise friend and mother of five reminded me...

God does not call us to ride it out in the safety of the boat.
He calls us into the stormy sea, because that is where we find him.

So if you could relate to what I wrote, I guess we're all in the stormy sea together. :-) Again, glad to know I'm not the only one floating without the proverbial paddle at times. And as if Someone knew exactly what I would need at this specific time (thank you Lord), the Chief is rescuing me from the stormy sea tomorrow for a 24 hour post birthday extravaganza. He genuinely wanted to do more but as he said, "It's only 24 hours but we'll take what we can get." AMEN to that one Chief! AMEN! Bon Voyage my fellow shipmates. See you soon...

Defeated...

Have you ever found yourself there? In that place? Do you know the one? The place where it seems no matter what you do or how hard you try you just can't seem to get it right? I seem to find myself a lot there lately. As a wife. a Mother. a friend. a ______. It seems as if the past year has blown by and I'm still waiting (not so patiently) for the dust to clear. What I'm realizing more and more is maybe the winds I'm waiting to settle are here to stay. And if I'm honest, I'm not sure how I feel about it.

I probably should not open open this can-o-worms but considering my man rarely reads my bloggy ramblings he'll likely never read this paragraph. :-) After 11 years of marriage, I can say I share my life with one awesome man. BUT. Marriage is hard work. Isn't it? Tonight we were watching the end of the Bachelorette (OK-it's trash-yes I know-but I love to watch the last one-I'm a girl-I love a happy ending-well, until they break up a few months from now but I digress). Tonight we were watching the end of the Bachelorette and I caught myself on the verge of laughter at their giddy-ness. Blahblahblah I thought. Blahblahblah. Isn't that sad? Then I wanted to cry because it wasn't that long ago that we were the same way. Well, I've never been thin and blond and my man doesn't speak Spanish and salsa dance but you get where I'm going with this, right? That was us way back when. And now? Now we're Mommy and Daddy. And we wouldn't change a thing. Not for a minute but it's still hard to be the parents of three bebes and find the opportunity to still be "us". By the time we made it to the end when they swept the "happy couple" off to Catalina Island via helicopter we both looked at each other green with envy. I wanted to grab Chris Harrison by the jacket and say, "They don't need a vacation to Catalina Island. Every married couple raising small children needs a trip to Catalina Island". You know what I mean? If you are a parent with children at home I'm sure you can relate. They say it takes a village and most of the time it feels like we're the only two adults in the village of Womble. Thus the reason we at times forget that our marriage comes BEFORE our children...not after.

Speaking of that old cliche, at times I wonder about the underlying meaning. If it takes a village to raise one child what does that mean for three? Do we need an entire zip code to do this thing the right way? And what is the right way anyway? As a Mom you give every ounce of yourself and in the end you can only pray that you make decisions that are pleasing to Him. That you raised them up to be children who love God and love people above all else. Some days I know I miss the mark on this parenting gig. Thus the reason of feeling defeated I think. They don't tell you in the Mommy manual that every time a new school year rolls around you will be just as nervous as they are. They don't tell you how you will pray for a teacher who will go out of her way to understand and appreciate the strengths and abilities of your first born. The manual doesn't tell you how to parent a 4 year old who thinks she is 16 (including girl drama and eye rolling--she is FOUR for Pete's sake)! The manual doesn't have a chapter on attachment, bonding or how to (graciously) reply to rude questions about the child who was born in our hearts.

Friends...ahhhhh...friends. You know, the amazing group of women I consider my "sisters" but I barely have 5 silent minutes to talk to them. Notice I said silent minutes because even when I hide behind the water closet door which is behind our bathroom door which is behind our bedroom door in our bedroom they still find me. And they knock at the door. And sometimes they bang. And cry for snacks. Or to go outside. Or to watch Caillou. And tell me I'm a mean-ie. All while I'm silently praying for my one daily phone call to the outside world which almost always ends with "Well, I guess that's my cue". Ahhhh...those friends. Those friends who I miss dearly but can't seem to find a quiet minute to catch up.

And ________. That is the blank for all the roles I should be filling but can't find the time to devote to them. You can fill it in. Daughter. Granddaughter. Volunteer. Nurse. Adoption Advocate. Name it. Fill it in.

Surely I can not be the only Mommy out there feeling stretched to the limit at times. Surely. Is there anyone who can relate to what I'm sayin'? Please refrain from the "you are a great Mom" routine. Mainly, I just want to know I'm not alone. Anyone? How do you keep it all running smoothly without leaving something or someone behind?

Today...

Mommy.
Mommy.
Mom!
Mom-ma?
Moooooooommmmmm-aaaaaaaaahhhhh.
MOMMA!
Can we go to the pool?
Can we have a popsicle?
Can I have some fruit snacks?
Can I have (insert any unhealthy food item here)?
Can we go to the park?
Can I play Wii?
Can I watch TV?
Is it time for snack?
Is it time for lunch?
Is it time for snaaaaacccccckkkkkkk yeeeeetttttt?????
I don't want to pick up my toys.
I don't want to clean up my lunch.
I don't want to take a rest.
I don't want to have quiet reading time.
I don't want to help with laundry.
{Child hits Mommy's broken finger and Mommy wimpers} Child says, "Well, maybe you should move your finger so I don't hit it next time." Ahem...excuse me?

OK, I'm checking out of this lovely Monday of motherhood. Love them and wouldn't trade them for all of Mr. Trump's dinero but they are on their own til Daddy comes home. I am now going to curl up in my closet in the fetal position and suck my thumb. Could someone please notify my children that whining is not allowed on Monday's?

Happy 10 months Mei Mei!

We've come a long way baby!

Happy 4th Y'all!

This was the best I could do this year. Food on their faces, Wild Man making crazy eyes and Mei Mei looks thrilled, doesn't she? She's still trying to figure out what the fuss is about. :-) Just for kicks, here's a flashback to 2009...
I am amazed by how much they've grown and changed in 12 short months. I remember snapping this photo last year and being a little sad that one of our little people was missing. Not this year! Happy 4th everyone--especially to our newest little American citizen.

Oh. My. WORD.

Dad Life from Church on the Move on Vimeo.

Mommy Rhapsody from Church on the Move on Vimeo.

I love this woman...